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Gratitude: Why it Solves Every Problem

There is so much to be grateful for.

I know you’ve heard that before.
Gratitude is a popular concept that we all “should” embrace.

And tomorrow is Thanksgiving, so what better time than to focus on all that you are grateful for, than then?

If you find yourself in a rough patch in your marriage though, finding anything to be grateful for can be really difficult.

If you find yourself completely overwhelmed at work, and annoyed with your colleagues, finding anything to be thankful about can seem like an impossible task.

If you find yourself sinking under the weight of motherhood, with children that don’t respect you, then finding a way to be appreciative is not the first thing that comes to mind.

But here’s the thing about gratitude:

It’s always the best solution if you want to feel better.

There is always, always, always something to be grateful for.
Even in those areas of life that test you, stretch you, and try you in ways you prefer they not.

It’s only in that testing, stretching, and trying that you become a much better version of yourself.

You may be saying, “Okay Chavonne, easy for you to say.”

I want to assure you, it is not.

I too am in a place where in certain areas of my life, it’s much easier to sit in defeat and self-pity than to focus on everything that is going right.

Just like you, I’m an over-achiever, and when a goal or desire is not met, or takes “too long” to manifest in my life, I get a little impatient, anxious, and frustrated.

It’s hard to feel like something should be one way, when everything in front of you is the complete opposite.

But that’s when gratitude is the MOST important.

That’s when your understanding of what you’ve been given already is MOST valuable.

That’s when your faith and belief in what you desire is MOST critical.

I know this because in other areas of my life, I’m reaping the benefits of the hard work of gratitude.

I’m now seeing how being grateful in the past is creating more to be grateful for in my present.

I want to encourage you to think about gratitude in a different way than you have ever done before.

It is one of the most effective life-coaching tools you could ever apply to your life.
It’s one of the hallmarks of our faith, and God encourages us to do it.

Here are 3 ways to re-frame your thinking about an “attitude of gratitude” so you get much more out of the experience and so that you become grateful at your deepest core. No matter what.

 

1. See gratitude as a discipline. 

Gratitude is not something that should be saved for special occasions and holidays. It is a discipline that should be practiced daily. And like all disciplines (going to work, taking a shower, brushing your teeth) it is one that should be considered a non-negotiable.

Start seeing gratitude as something you do ALL the time. Not just when things are going great, and the things to be grateful for are easy to find. But for the rest of the year, commit yourself to finding three deep and meaningful things to be grateful for each day. It will change your life.

2.  See gratitude as self-care. 

Often times gratitude is something we express to other people. We say thank you when others are kind to us. We view gratitude as something external to ourselves to be given to others.

But gratitude is also self-care.

Whether it’s appreciating yourself, and all that makes you amazing, or taking a moment to celebrate your accomplishments and progress, gratitude is one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself. “I”m grateful for me.” is something I encourage you to start saying to yourself each day. It’s a great confidence booster.

#3. Focus on the insignificant. 

It’s easy to be grateful for your life, health, the income you have, and your material possessions. It’s easy to be grateful for the important people in your life. But what about those small, teeny, tiny, almost insignificant details of your life? Like the fact that your husband did wash the dishes eventually? Or that your colleague did care enough to offer feedback? Or that you are able to cover that unexpected expense? Or that you got one positive response from your child?

Focusing on those smaller wins that would otherwise go unnoticed expands your consciousness and pulls into your mind more things to be grateful for.

At the beginning of this year, I read Thank and Grow Rich by Pam Grout and she suggests you make gratitude a game. Try it. How many small, seemingly insignificant things can you bring to your mind to be grateful for? I’ll challenge you to 100. Make it fun. You’ll feel so much better. You should even ask your family to play along.

I hope you’ll really take the time to think about gratitude in a different way. It’s such an important practice and instantly lifts your mood.

And now, I want to take this time to thank you, my dear reader.

Thank you for becoming a member of my community.

Thank you for trusting me with a few minutes of your time today.

Thank you for opening up my blog and welcoming my words into your life.

Thank you for forgiving me when I have a typo or two.

Thank you for sharing my posts with those you care about.

Thank you for thinking deeply about the message I share.

Thank you for taking action and doing things differently in your life.

Thank you for being here with me.

Thank you for trusting me with the most important area of your life.

Thank you for your words of appreciation as you write back to me.

Thank you for believing in me and what I’m doing when I couldn’t believe for myself.

Thank you for praying for my marriage and for my overall well-being.

Thank you for becoming my clients and for seeing me as your mentor.

Thank you for reading my book and for valuing what I have to say.

Thank you for attending my events and for being a positive presence in the room.

Thank you for reading all the way to the end.

I love you and am so, so, grateful I get to do this with you every single day.

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Have an amazing, amazing Thanksgiving!

Dr. Chavonne

By Chavonne Perotte

Trained Researcher. Empathetic Listener. Passionate Speaker. Goal guider. Relationship Builder.
Dr. Chavonne Perotte is a public health researcher who, over the past 10 years, has developed a range of curricula on healthy relationships, and conducted educational trainings, interactive workshops, and large conferences. Chavonne received her doctorate in public health from the Johns Hopkins University and focused her research on sexual health. It was there that she discovered her passion for hearing people’s stories, writing about their lives and creating solutions for common relationship issues. Chavonne is a dynamic speaker who is able to use her experiences, skills and knowledge to inspire people to take action in their own lives. She is the founder and CEO of RelateABLE, a relationship development and coaching group that guides individuals in creating the relationships they want. She is also the owner of The Glamorous Life Events, a full scale event planning and management firm. An aspiring author, Chavonne is currently working on a book that supports couples in effectively navigating infertility. Chavonne grew up in Northern Virginia and now lives in New Jersey where she enjoys her roles as a wife and new mother.