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We're so happy you stopped by! If you are tired of feeling the same way, having the same argument, or getting upset over the same things, we can help. We are all about giving you the best strategies to relate well to anyone and anything in your life. You really can have relationships that are happy and a life you love. No matter what others are doing or not doing, no matter what's happening or not happening. Let us show you how.

This RelateAble Life

Our rantings about how to relate well to anyone and anything in your life.

Become Your Best Self

Every once in a while, life will hand you situations that show you how you need to raise the bar on your own ways of operating. I had one of these moments last week. My younger sister had finally divulged the news that she was “seeing” someone. This information, a total shock and surprise to […]

21 Feb 18 Chavonne Perotte

Why Every Day Will NEVER Be Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is one of those occasions that can either bring out the best in your marriage, or shine a spotlight on all that’s going wrong. It’s a day that you can wake up to excited for the romantic gestures of your husband, or disappointed that the signs of any romance between you two are […]

14 Feb 18 Chavonne Perotte

How to Avoid Ruining Your Marriage After You Have Kids

Recently, my husband and I were asked to be the featured speakers at a marriage ministry event. As I went back and forth with the organizer about the time, I was confronted with many realities that are all too common for those of us who have young children and ever want to do things alone […]

13 Feb 18 Chavonne Perotte

Bring fun back to your marriage with these 3 steps

Last year, I celebrated my 40th Birthday at my favorite Cuban Restaurant, Cuba Libre. Seated around me in perfect formation were 5 of my dearest and closest friends. As I looked at their faces in the dimly lit dining room, I felt so incredibly comfortable and at ease. I laughed and giggled like a little school girl. And […]

01 Feb 18 Chavonne Perotte

What to Pray for Your Marriage So that God Answers

The unraveling of my marriage was not something that announced itself with the formality or grandeur of a symphony orchestra. It was more of a quiet, consistent, side note. And an off-key on at that. Slowly over time, other things took priority. For me, it was becoming a mom, while also trying to build a […]

28 Jan 18 Chavonne Perotte

What to do when your marriage is falling apart (WNW #108)

Why Not WednesdayIt’s Wednesday, let’s go!WNW #108: Keep Trying Every couple has their hot-button issues. The things that need to be discussed that always leaves one or both of you feeling not so great about the exchange. My husband and I are no different. But one of my goals for my marriage this year is to […]

24 Jan 18 Chavonne Perotte

The 1 step that changes everything (WNW #107)

Why Not WednesdayIt’s Wednesday, let’s go!WNW #107: Step 1 Have you ever looked at certain situations in your life and felt a deep sense of overwhelm? Like you don’t even know where to begin or what to do first? It could be as simple as finally organizing your closet, or as ambitious as becoming debt free, […]

17 Jan 18 Chavonne Perotte

One Step to Making Your Marriage Better (WNW #106)

Why Not WednesdayIt’s Wednesday, let’s go!WNW #106: What are you planning for? On Saturday my husband and I made the trip back from North Carolina to New Jersey. Another 7 plus hours in the car. I had been looking forward to this trip because I had so many things I wanted to talk about. So many […]

10 Jan 18 Chavonne Perotte

4 Steps to Take in 2018 (WNW #105)

Why Not WednesdayIt’s Wednesday, let’s go!WNW #105: HAPPY NEW YEAR! It’s January 3rd already. Can you believe it?? There’s a lot of good energy as everyone wants to start the year off right. But if I can be honest with you, I started the year a little confused about some areas of my life. Confused about […]

03 Jan 18 Chavonne Perotte

5 Ways to Reclaim Your Time, Your Identity, and Your Focus NOW

It never fails. As soon as you sit down to have a quiet moment for yourself, someone needs you. Your time immediately becomes consumed by meeting their needs, addressing their wants, and catering to their desires. There was a time where you joyfully did those things, but now they seem like impositions. Inconveniences. Inconsideration. And […]

28 Nov 17 Chavonne Perotte

Why Not Wednesday #94

Why Not Wednesday It’s Wednesday, let’s go! WNW #94: Just ask.  Often, when my daughter Madison is trying to do something, and it’s not working out, she starts to cry. Her efforts to put the legos together, or get the doll to sit upright, or to get the stickers to actually stick is a source of […]

18 Oct 17 Chavonne Perotte

5 Marriage Mistakes You Should Have Left Behind By Now

If you’re like most people, you started 2017 with hope and excitment for what this new year would bring. You want to start fresh, eyes big with total excitement and anticipation for the things ahead of you. Because, let’s be honest, there are some things you experienced last year that you could not wait to […]

08 Mar 17 Chavonne Perotte

12 Signs Your Marriage Is Losing It’s Spark

Let’s take a trip down memory lane. Think back to those early days in your relationship. I’m sure there are a few moments in time that are forever marked in your memory. Times where you and your love were soooo into each other, living life like an Alicia Keys song (cue Teenage Love Affair) or […]

07 Feb 17 Chavonne Perotte

5 Habits Every Wife Needs to Develop in 2017

In the long list of New Years Resolutions, where does your marriage fall? Do you have a vision, hope, prayer or goal for what your life will be like with your husband in 2017? Is your thinking focused more on the things he needs to be doing differently, or have you actually taken a good […]

31 Dec 16 Chavonne Perotte

3 Reasons NOW is the Time to Fix Your Marriage

Have you ever had the best intentions to get to something only to have it remain on your to-do list month after month? You know it needs your attention, but you just can’t get yourself together to make it happen. That thing, whatever it is, sort of looms there in the back of your mind, […]

30 Dec 16 Chavonne Perotte

5 Lessons that Will Improve Your Marriage

“Nothing ever goes away until it teaches you what you need to know.” -Pema Chodron A new year is approaching. It will bring new opportunities. New experiences. New memories. New goals and accomplishments. Exciting, isn’t it? There’s a sense of optimism and positivity that naturally comes along with a fresh start. I’m sure you’re thinking […]

27 Dec 16 Chavonne Perotte

3 Most Powerful Truths to Finally Admit…and to Get the Marriage Breakthrough You Need

Around this time of year, when you’re not busy trying to find that “must have” Christmas item, you may find yourself being reflective about all that 2016 has brought you. And while there have definitely been some great moments and things that have brought you joy, you find yourself thinking more and more about the […]

21 Dec 16 Chavonne Perotte

5 Marriage Mistakes to Leave Behind in 2016

If you’re like most people, you are in a mode of looking ahead for what you hope 2017 will bring. You want to start fresh, eyes big with total excitement and anticipation for the things ahead of you. Because, let’s be honest, there are some things you experienced this year that you can’t wait to […]

12 Dec 16 Chavonne Perotte

UN-Happily Married: Is this really who you want to be?

The question, is this really who you want to be, is incredibly powerful. It implies that we have a choice in who we are. Now of course, this makes sense on the surface. We choose what job or career we’ll have. We choose to become a wife. We choose to become a mother. We choose […]

10 Nov 16 Chavonne Perotte

4 Communication Mistakes that Keep You Arguing

Have you ever felt like you’re pouring your heart out to your husband and he’s totally dismissing what you are saying? Telling you, that you shouldn’t think or feel a certain way? That the way you are reacting to something is all wrong and that there’s a “right” way to go about doing things? It’s […]

01 Sep 16 Chavonne Perotte

The Real Solution to Fix Your Marriage

Let me paint the picture. Your communication is awful. Either every little thing turns into an argument, or you just don’t talk at all. You feel like everything else is a priority before you. You are so starved for attention and nothing you try seems to work. In fact, it seems like he’s pulling back […]

28 Aug 16 Chavonne Perotte

Connect4Love 4-Day Challenge

Imagine feeling just as in love as you did on the day you said “I DO”… Imagine being able to enjoy every second you get to spend with your husband… Imagine having fun again, laughing with the man who really is your best friend… Imagine feeling closer than ever before and being able to talk […]

19 Jun 16 Chavonne Perotte

Connect4Love 4-Day Challenge

  WANT TO FEEL JUST AS HAPPY TOGETHER AS ON YOUR WEDDING DAY? Imagine feeling just as in love as you did on the day you said “I DO”… Imagine being able to enjoy every second you get to spend with your husband… Imagine having fun again, laughing with the man who really is your […]

12 Jun 16 Chavonne Perotte

How to Resurrect Your Marriage: 3 Things to Do Today

What seems dead can be brought back to life. This weekend marks Easter Sunday, a time where Christians celebrate the crucifixion and more importantly, resurrection of Jesus Christ. It is the hallmark of our faith. Believing that something thought completely dead can rise up and be more powerful than ever before. Seeing something lifeless before […]

24 Mar 16 Chavonne Perotte

5 Rituals All Couples Should Have

Rituals create order when life is chaotic. Rituals offer consistency when things get off track. Rituals set expectations when our moods might be unpredictable. Rituals are a good thing. You may have grown up with certain rituals, that now, just represent how you do things. There are no questions, no debates, no deviations. It’s just […]

24 Feb 16 Chavonne Perotte

Why Treating Him is a Gift to Yourself

Have you ever gone shopping for someone and got so excited about presenting your gift to them? When you were so sure they would love it, and you could barely wait to see the expression on their face? The anticipation is sooooo great. You smile just thinking about how you’ll make their day. It’s a […]

17 Feb 16 Chavonne Perotte

Married and Heartbroken on Valentine’s Day: How to Deal

Not everyone gets excited about Valentine’s Day. For some of us, the day brings sadness instead of roses. Instead of a romantic dinner, it brings a longing for how things used to be. We’ll get no card expressing our Valentine’s undying love for us. We won’t be feeding each other chocolate covered strawberries. Instead, we’ll […]

12 Feb 16 Chavonne Perotte

Let the Music Play

Are you a hopeless romantic? You know, the type who loves movies like The Notebook. Your perfect Sunday afternoon involves watching the latest love story on Lifetime or the Hallmark Channel. You are a sucker for the lines and the way the man looks at the woman with such love and adoration. It just melts […]

10 Feb 16 Chavonne Perotte

Why You Should Never Forget the Good Times

  In the hustle and bustle of daily life, it’s so easy to get into a routine of just going, going, going. The conversations with your husband can seem to only focus on the logistics of those daily tasks. What will we have for dinner? Who’s going to take the kids here and there? Can […]

03 Feb 16 Chavonne Perotte

How to Make Time for Your Marriage When You Don’t Have the Time

It’s hard to believe we are in March of 2016. I mean, where is the time going? There were probably so many things you wanted to accomplish in these first couple of months. You know, start the year off right? But your to-do list just keeps growing and the time you have just keeps on […]

27 Jan 16 Chavonne Perotte

The Most Important Question to Improve Your Marriage Now

All marriages start out great. You’re ecstatic to have found the love of your life. You are filled with so much joy and anticipation for how your life will unfold. Never in a million years could you imagine not being this much in love. The things you adore about your husband are endless. Then somewhere […]

20 Jan 16 Chavonne Perotte

5 Ways to a Better Marriage in 2016

I don’t know about you, but the start of a new year always inspires me to take stock of the areas of my life that I’d like to pay more attention to. Goals I want to achieve. Ways I want to be different. It’s really inspiring. At first. The problem is that I want to […]

13 Jan 16 Chavonne Perotte

How to Turn Your Breakdown into a Breakthrough

OK, I’m really letting you in now. Please don’t judge me… The past 18 months have been a whirlwind of activity for me. I gave birth to my first child.  I left my high paying, senior level job to pursue my own business, lost one of my best friends to breast cancer, and now we […]

06 Jan 16 Chavonne Perotte

Give to Get: 3 Reasons to Expand Your Love Language

Love languages. That’s what this week’s challenge was all about. Learning how to communicate your love in a way your spouse can best understand and receive. And I know some of you may be saying, “But I don’t feel like it!” I don’t like to be all touchy feely. (physical touch) I don’t have the […]

23 Sep 15 Chavonne Perotte

3 Reasons To Look a Little Longer in the Mirror

It’s the second week of our challenge and I am thrilled that you are hanging in there with me! So, as a reminder, this week’s challenge is all about looking in the mirror – examining ourselves and what we can do to become a better partner. It’s so easy to focus in on all the […]

16 Sep 15 Chavonne Perotte

When You’re Just Not in the Mood

Has this ever happened to you? You’re just settling in to sleep after a long and exhausting day. Your pillow feels so good and you cannot wait to get to sleep. Then, slowly, slowly, your husband inches his way over to you. Wraps his arms around your belly, and nuzzles his head on your neck. […]

13 Sep 15 Chavonne Perotte

3 Reasons to Live the Dream

“Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” ~Napoleon Hill The quote above has been said in many different ways by many different people. One of the reasons it’s so popular, is because it’s true. You’ll find this concept in nearly every religion and from anyone who had achieved true greatness in their […]

29 Jul 15 Chavonne Perotte

3 Ways Gratitude Can Transform Your Marriage

The practice of gratitude is so essential to creating a happy and more loving marriage that I wanted to start our challenge with this principle. Didn’t get a chance to be in my love challenge? No worries, new ones will be coming in 2016! A key ingredient to improving our marriages and relationship with our […]

09 Jul 15 Chavonne Perotte

5 Questions That Will Change How You See Your Mate

                OK, be honest with me. Have you ever asked yourself ANY of the following questions: Why does he always do that? What in the world was he thinking? Why can’t he just do the one thing I ask? What will it take to make him change? Why […]

24 Jun 15 Chavonne Perotte

Is Your Marriage Off Track? 10 Questions to Ask and What to Do if Your Answer is Yes

            When you walked down the aisle and said I do, how did you imagine your life together would look? Did you expect your love to only grow over time? Did you think your happiest moments would always outweigh the most difficult ones? Did you believe that love conquers all? […]

15 Jun 15 Chavonne Perotte

Why I Literally Wanted to Cry…

This was my face last night. Let me set this up for you. As you probably know I am a new entrepreneur. And building a business is hard work. It can also be lonely work, especially when you’re used to working with a team of folks whose job it is to support you and help […]

10 Jun 15 Chavonne Perotte

Great Communication in 1 Simple Step

One of the most common issues in marriages and relationships is the issue of communication. Maybe you can relate to one of the following sentences: We just don’t communicate. He doesn’t understand me. I don’t understand him. It seems like we are speaking two different languages. He never communicates. The funny thing is, we are […]

09 Jun 15 Chavonne Perotte

5 Reasons to Stop Talking to People about Your Marriage

He really got on your nerves this time. You are so angry you don’t know what to do. You can’t believe this has happened. You are completely and totally devastated. How could he be so inconsiderate? Does he ever think about anyone but himself? Where did you go wrong? How did things get so off […]

04 Jun 15 Chavonne Perotte

3 Things I’d Say to Kris Jenner

As Caitlyn (formerly Bruce) Jenner made her photographic debut to the world, many of us examined her images with extreme interest. We analyzed every detail of her appearance, made declarations of who she now resembled, and asked almost everyone we know if they had seen the pictures. I personally wish her well and hope that […]

02 Jun 15 Chavonne Perotte

Marriage Problems: 5 Things to Do When Times Get Tough

  As I hung up the phone, I could feel the anger swelling up inside of me. I had tried my best to be calm and nice. I had even practiced what I was going to say and the tone of my voice. I was trying to reach out. And I really didn’t want to. […]

27 May 15 Chavonne Perotte

A Relationship UpDate for You…

Let’s face it. We know spending quality time with our mate is important. We want to connect. We want to feel close. But time just never seems to be on our side. There’s always something else that has to get done right now. When we get home from work we are too exhausted or are […]

13 May 15 Chavonne Perotte

Relationship High: 5 Ways to Keep the Good Times Going

Whether you attended our recent UpDate Couple’s Event, or not, you’ve probably had a high point in your relationship in the not too distant past. A point where you really enjoyed each other’s company. Where you felt really connected. Where you were able to communicate effectively. A time when you were just really happy. Now, […]

06 May 15 Chavonne Perotte

While InFertility: 3 Lessons the Child You’re Dreaming of Needs You to Learn

This week is National Infertility Awareness Week. As someone who experienced infertility, I know firsthand what it is like to want nothing more than to bring a child into this world. I won’t ever forget what it felt like month after month, negative test after negative test to have your dreams slip father and father […]

22 Apr 15 Chavonne Perotte

Showing Compassion in Our Relationships

I’ve been thinking a lot about one of the questions that was raised in my talk: “Not So Happily Ever After: 10 Keys to Getting the Relationship You Want.” It’s on the topic of Compassion. The audience member was acknowledging how kind and compassionate she can be towards other people (co-workers, distant friends, even strangers) […]

06 Apr 15 Chavonne Perotte

After the Silent Treatment: 5 Strategies to Reconnecting

  He was frustrated. I felt unheard. And the conversation ended with no resolution. We didn’t really speak for the rest of the day. In the silence, I filled my mind with a list of reasons why he was wrong and how unreasonable he was being. He did the same. Do you know how tense […]

06 Mar 15 Chavonne Perotte

Why not Me?

There is nothing worse than desperately longing for a child while everyone else around you is getting pregnant. By accident. On the first try. And worse…unwanted. It’s like pouring salt into a 10 foot open wound. Jealousy is a natural feeling and you probably find yourself obsessing over the fact that you deserve a child […]

10 Feb 15 Chavonne Perotte

10 Tips to Help You Stop Obsessing About Becoming Pregnant

For sure, it seems nearly impossible to stop obsessing about pregnancy while dealing with infertility. Babies are all around you. You spend countless hours in the doctor’s office checking this, assessing that – all in the hopes of having the sperm meet the egg. Here are some ideas for how to get pregnancy off your […]

18 Dec 14 Chavonne Perotte

Best Responses to the Question: “When are you going to have kids??”

We’ve all had the moment where someone asks the question, “When are you going to have kids?” Depending on the person and the day, we may feel anger, frustration, sadness or uncertainty. Whether the question is expected or it comes as a complete surprise, it’s helpful to think ahead about how we might respond. If […]

25 Nov 14 Chavonne Perotte

How to Be Yourself: 3 Things to Think About

I’m a bit of a chameleon, and can adapt easily to different settings and groups of people. You probably are too. You have your work persona, your home persona and then your social persona. Each a slightly remixed version of yourself; each complete with an underlying desire to meet approval and be accepted. All that […]

16 Oct 14 Chavonne Perotte